caught red handed

Gah! I am a criminal in my own bank! They have sophisticated ways of getting to you these days. Here I am, innocently trying to book something online when it tells me I need a securecode. A securewhat?! I put in the detaiils it asks me but it refuses to grant me a secure code. I call up the bank. He asks me some questions. Name, date of birth. First and fourth number of my internet bank code. I don't know, I never usually call you up! What are the 9 numbers at the bottom of the card? This is not going well. My mouth gets dry. I don't have the card on me! Its at home! All I have are the usual numbers I need to get stuff from amazon!So stupid! I panic and hang up the phone acting like anyone who's stolen the card details might.

Later, I call them back with my card in my hand. But its too late. My account has RED ALERT written all over it. They won't let me do anything over the phone and are in the process of dispatching a SECURITY PACK to my house. The man on his headset is from yorkshire and I don't like the way he's pronouncing my name. It's going to take a few good weeks to get the pack here and back and get me a securecode. Darn it! Cutting internet shopping privileges...why, that's behaviour worthy of THE EXPERIMENT!